Choosing freedom.

I could feel it sneaking up on me. That feeling when things start spinning out of control. 

Days when I wake up at 2a.m. with my heart beating out of my chest and my body trembling. 

I've shared openly about my struggles with fear and anxiety but I rarely share about what lurks in the shadows. 

I've spent half of my life battling an eating disorder. The visible signs ebb and flo but the fact is that battle never goes away. It's always there lurking in the shadows waiting to rear its ugly head. Waiting for the anxiety and fear to sneak up and waiting for me to feel like things are out of control. 

For me it has never been as much about appearance as it has been a coping mechanism; a sense of control when everything else was out of control. A comfort when I felt betrayed. 

I know now that those were lies and at my lowest point on the scale it wasn't under my control; it controlled me. 

I have learned since my last and worst battle how to keep it under control. I've learned that while it will always be there lurking, I don't have to be held captive by those chains that keep me from living in complete freedom from this. 

I'm continuing to choose freedom. 

I'm choosing to exercise and eat healthy. I'm choosing balance. I'm choosing to set a positive example for my children, especially my daughter. 

I want my children to engrave 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 into their hearts.

"Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; You were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."

I want them to know that "Everything is permissible- but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible- but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good but the good of others.... Whether you eat or drink or what ever you do, do it all for the glory of God." 1 Corinthians 10:23-24 &31

As I live with more intention in this area I hope that I honor God in whatever I do. I hope that my children see that this life is all for His glory. 

Easter 'bird nest' snack!

I just wanted to share a quick post with the recipe for the Easter 'bird nest' snack I made for Ellie Kate's class! 

My mom used to make these for Easter when I was little.

Making them with my little's last night brought back so many sweet memories of Easter for me. 

They are super easy to make. The kids had a blast placing the eggs in the nests. Of course, Jude's favorite part was helping stir the chocolate and noodles. (That was the messiest part!)

What you need:

*This recipe made 30 nests for us.

12 oz package of Chow mein noodles

10 oz bag of whoppers mini eggs

23 oz bag of milk chocolate morsels 

(Or a package of vanilla candiquick if you prefer white chocolate)

Microwave safe bowl or melting pot

A large mixing bowl 

A spoon for stirring 

Baking sheet or wax paper for drying the nests. 

Next:

Place chow mein noodles in the bowl. Simply melt your preferred chocolate in a separate microwave safe bowl (or melting pot) and pour over the noodles. You'll need to stir the chocolate several times to make sure all of the noodles are covered thoroughly. 

Depending on the size you want your nest to be, spoon out your chocolate covered noodles and manipulate them onto the baking sheet or wax paper so that they resemble a nest. 

*I put a small dent in the middle so that the eggs would be a bit more secure.  Immediately place three eggs in the nest after each nest is complete because you'll want to be sure the chocolate is still somewhat melted. This helps so that when the chocolate dries it will act as a glue to hold them in place. Let them dry completely. 

Then, indulge.

I hope you enjoy them as much as we do! 

Happy Easter!